GMcB: Hi darlin' . Nice to hear from ye. Are ye in town? (frowning) Ahh, that's too bad....
Listens.
 |
| "I know I promised, but..." |
Listens.
GMcB: No, honestly, I'm not blowin' ye off, it's just that, well, ye'll naiver believe it anyway, but I was in Scotland for a while vistin' relatives....kind an emergency, ye ken?
Listens.
GMcB: Yeah, I know I promised, but ...
Listens.
GMcB: Well be sure to call me next time ye're in town. If I'm here I promise ye dinner at the least, okay?
Listens.
GMcB: Yeah, o' course I had a good time with ye?
Listens.
GMcB: Ye know how it is lass. Listen, I gotta go. I got company.
Listens.
GMcB: No, not a she! A fellow Scot. But if it were a she?
Listens.
GMcB: (sighing deeply) I'm sorry ye feel that way, but we agreed we would keep it simple. No strings.
Listens.
GMcB: (banging the phone on the table) My phone's cuttin' out. I'll call ye back!
Hanging up the phone, he buries it under a pillow and piles a couple of more on top of it before returning to the table. The phone rings again, but very muffled.
GMcB: I knew all those pillows would come in handy fer something.
He takes a sip of his latte.
GMcB: I knew all those pillows would come in handy fer something.
He takes a sip of his latte.
GMcB: Fuck! It's cold aaready.
Turning to Jamie.
GMcB: Ye see, this is a pairfect example o' why I prefer a girl like Elisa. Bloody women want yer arm and yer leg when ye just want a little lovin' fer the night an' once ye see em more than once or twice, they think they own ye. I'm not ready to be owned by anythin' or anyone. I got too much goin' on.
JMcF: Ye'd think a bloke yer age would want a home and family.
GMcB: Would ye quit wi' the age thing! Times have changed. Today one out o' every two marriages ends up in divorce. I don't want to join the statistics yet, aye?
JMcF: (shrugs) If ye're Catholic, that shouldna be a problem.
GMcB: Well I'm not that kind o' Catholic. Besides, I travel all the time and I'm never in one place long enough to make a nest with anyone. I'm not the nestin' type I guess....an' a girl like Elisa is hot and knows just what I need. She disna give me any crap, already knows the worst about me an' I don't have to worry about catchin' anything from her. She's checked regular like and I pay her enough she disna have to sleep around.
JMcF: Aye, but dinna ye ever crave a sweet, innocent girl?
GMcB: Sure, but there arna too many sweet, innocent girls anymore. And if ye like em too young, ye get sent up the river fer a stretch.... in prison. There are laws.....
JMcF: Really? How young is too young?
GMcB: Anyone under 18.
JMcF: (incredulous) You canna be serious, man?
GMcB: Ye'd better believe it, lad! Trust me, I've come close making that mistake more than a few times. In my business it's too easy to get in trouble wi' everyone looking over ye're shoulder and girls comin' on to you all the time. Ye almost have to check I.D.'s If ye think today was bad....it was nothing.
JMcF: I.D.'s?
GMcB: Yeah. Papers people carry to prove their age. Usually a driver's license....a paper that gives ye permission to drive a car and proves ye're old enough to drink.
JMcF: (incredulous) Tae drink? Boy, ye seem to need papers fer everything here. What a bother.
Thinking furiously.
JMcF: Dae ye need papers to fornicate too?
GMcB: (laughing) Not quite, but sometimes it pays to carry a little paper listing results of recent medical tests for diseases of a sexual nature.
JMcF: Ye mean like tae declare ye havena got the pox?
GMcB: (grinning) Something like that....the names are different but yeah....every once in a while someone more discerning will ask.
JMcF: (scratching his head) Well that's not altogether a bad thing is it?
GMcB: Not if everyone were honest and up front about it, but they aren't...so you have to be careful as well as honest. It's a very complicated dance sometimes....even though some people think I just jump into the sack wi' every woman I meet. If they only knew how not true that was. (grinning) Every other one maybe... but.... Besides, being with those sweet, young things is sometimes more dangerous in that area too. That's a hard one to learn in more ways than one.
JMcF: Ye mean getting someone wi' child?
GMcB: No, but that's another whole set of problems and another reason to avoid certain situations. Some women still use that one to get ye to marry them and I have no desire to be a father just yet, if ever. That will never happen with Elisa and her counterparts, condoms or not.
JMcF: Ye mean ye have others like Elisa?
GMcB: Maybe. Makes life easier on people like me. If ye got money, someone is going to want some of it, one way or the other. I just like to choose where it goes. (laughs) I mean the money too! It took me a while to learn that one.
JMcF: (scratching his head) So how are we going to find Captain Randall? From the looks of the place, he hasn't gone back there.
GMcB: Well, I've got someone watching the loft, so if he comes back we'll know. But I think a good place to start is some of the S and M bars. Ye up to some adventure?
JMcF: I thought ye'd never ask. I was getting a little tired o' sittin' around. By the way, what is an S & M bar?
GMcB: (grinning mischievously) Wait an' see highlander. Wait and see.
Jamie shrugs.
GMcB: Come on. We're going to have to dress for the part ... I know someone who can help with that.
JMcF: Dress for the part?
Three hours and some fine tuning later, Gerremy McButler and Jamie McFraser were standing in front of The Cock and Ball. Unrecognizable in variations of leather pants, sleeveless shirts, fake tats on their upper arms, myriad chains, spike leather neck belts, fake sideburns, and leather boots, they looked like something out of Mad Max the Road Warrior. Jamie's long hair was pulled back in a thick ponytail. He was shaking his head.
JMcF: I feel like a fool! Are ye sure this is the way to go aboot this?
GMcB: Ye said ye wanted to be an actor...well this calls fer some play actin'. Follow my lead. We got to get to the back room o' this place, cause if our Captain is here, that's were he'll be. One of my friends says this place is the real thing an' not just some fantasy pretend for gay blades.
JMcF: Speak Scottish, man. What nonsense are ye talkin"?
GMcB: Gay is the term for men who like men in this day and age. Some of them like to play dress up at times and this S & M is a part of it, but there are some who are really into the pain thing. If we can find those hard core types, I'm bettin' our dragoon will be around, unless he's found a way into the private underground clubs. If that's the case, maybe someone has seen him.
JMcF: We'll if we find him, he's mine. I owe him for the stripes on my back, ye ken?
GMcB: Ye're welcome to him...but ye got to promise he goes back through the mirror wi' ye. I canna afford him recognizing me and tellin' tales.
JMcF: When I finish wi' him there may not be a lot to take back...
GMcB: Suit yerself, but not in public, ye hear? The cops will lock us up again and my publicist had a hell o' a time keepin' that little incident quiet.
JMcF: Well, let's get on wi' it man! These tight britches are riding up ma arse and I canna wait to take them off.
GMcB: (chuckling) I'm sure there will be someone inside who'd be willin' to take on that chore.
Gerremy steps forward and through the door, Jamie's dirty look boring a hole through his neck.
Songs out of tune, the words always a little wrong...Canzoni Stonate
Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction that exists only in the twilight zone of the writer's mind. Any and all resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidental.
JMcF: I.D.'s?
GMcB: Yeah. Papers people carry to prove their age. Usually a driver's license....a paper that gives ye permission to drive a car and proves ye're old enough to drink.
JMcF: (incredulous) Tae drink? Boy, ye seem to need papers fer everything here. What a bother.
Thinking furiously.
JMcF: Dae ye need papers to fornicate too?
GMcB: (laughing) Not quite, but sometimes it pays to carry a little paper listing results of recent medical tests for diseases of a sexual nature.
JMcF: Ye mean like tae declare ye havena got the pox?
GMcB: (grinning) Something like that....the names are different but yeah....every once in a while someone more discerning will ask.
JMcF: (scratching his head) Well that's not altogether a bad thing is it?
GMcB: Not if everyone were honest and up front about it, but they aren't...so you have to be careful as well as honest. It's a very complicated dance sometimes....even though some people think I just jump into the sack wi' every woman I meet. If they only knew how not true that was. (grinning) Every other one maybe... but.... Besides, being with those sweet, young things is sometimes more dangerous in that area too. That's a hard one to learn in more ways than one.
JMcF: Ye mean getting someone wi' child?
GMcB: No, but that's another whole set of problems and another reason to avoid certain situations. Some women still use that one to get ye to marry them and I have no desire to be a father just yet, if ever. That will never happen with Elisa and her counterparts, condoms or not.
JMcF: Ye mean ye have others like Elisa?
GMcB: Maybe. Makes life easier on people like me. If ye got money, someone is going to want some of it, one way or the other. I just like to choose where it goes. (laughs) I mean the money too! It took me a while to learn that one.
JMcF: (scratching his head) So how are we going to find Captain Randall? From the looks of the place, he hasn't gone back there.
JMcF: I thought ye'd never ask. I was getting a little tired o' sittin' around. By the way, what is an S & M bar?
GMcB: (grinning mischievously) Wait an' see highlander. Wait and see.
Jamie shrugs.
GMcB: Come on. We're going to have to dress for the part ... I know someone who can help with that.
JMcF: Dress for the part?
Three hours and some fine tuning later, Gerremy McButler and Jamie McFraser were standing in front of The Cock and Ball. Unrecognizable in variations of leather pants, sleeveless shirts, fake tats on their upper arms, myriad chains, spike leather neck belts, fake sideburns, and leather boots, they looked like something out of Mad Max the Road Warrior. Jamie's long hair was pulled back in a thick ponytail. He was shaking his head.
 |
| The Cock and Ball |
GMcB: Ye said ye wanted to be an actor...well this calls fer some play actin'. Follow my lead. We got to get to the back room o' this place, cause if our Captain is here, that's were he'll be. One of my friends says this place is the real thing an' not just some fantasy pretend for gay blades.
JMcF: Speak Scottish, man. What nonsense are ye talkin"?
GMcB: Gay is the term for men who like men in this day and age. Some of them like to play dress up at times and this S & M is a part of it, but there are some who are really into the pain thing. If we can find those hard core types, I'm bettin' our dragoon will be around, unless he's found a way into the private underground clubs. If that's the case, maybe someone has seen him.
JMcF: We'll if we find him, he's mine. I owe him for the stripes on my back, ye ken?
GMcB: Ye're welcome to him...but ye got to promise he goes back through the mirror wi' ye. I canna afford him recognizing me and tellin' tales.
JMcF: When I finish wi' him there may not be a lot to take back...
GMcB: Suit yerself, but not in public, ye hear? The cops will lock us up again and my publicist had a hell o' a time keepin' that little incident quiet.
JMcF: Well, let's get on wi' it man! These tight britches are riding up ma arse and I canna wait to take them off.
GMcB: (chuckling) I'm sure there will be someone inside who'd be willin' to take on that chore.
Gerremy steps forward and through the door, Jamie's dirty look boring a hole through his neck.
Songs out of tune, the words always a little wrong...Canzoni Stonate
Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction that exists only in the twilight zone of the writer's mind. Any and all resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidental.
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